Bringing the Kids Along
We have four kids. As you learned in the last post, we are working on adding #5. One of the biggest hurdles we worked through when deciding if we would move forward with adoption was how it would effect the four children we already have.
We have tried to help Easton and Catherine, at 6 years old, understand their place in all of this. We let them give input and opinion in an effort to make them feel like they have a say in the decision as well. They pray for their sister almost every night and are anxious to get her home. Even though they were on board, we still had concerns.
The same questions repeatedly entered the conversation as Erin and I worked through the decision.
Will it be hard on our kids? Yes. Will it cause us all to sacrifice? Yes. Will it be difficult to adjust? Yes. Does it make sense? Nope.
Then we began to really look at how we want to raise our children, and what we want them to know about God and the world when they leave our house and authority. Do we want them to think that life is easy? No. Do we want them to make sacrifices for the sake of the Gospel? Yes. Do we want them to live by faith? Yes.
What they will be learning about life, love, and the God who loves them unconditionally will overshadow any hardship that may come. At least, that is what we pray over them every night.
Those People…
We have four kids. People look at us funny when we are at the mall or restaurants. We are young parents, so some probably think we are just babysitting. If they ask anything at all, the most common question is “are they all yours?” Yes, they belong to us.
Slowly, we have grown more accustomed to the fact that we don’t look like the average American family. It rarely even comes up in our discussions any more.
Then, we started talking about adding #5.
That is when we truly had to consider what it meant to be “Those People.” You know, the ones that get made fun of because they have so many kids. The ones that get introduced as “the family with lots of kids.” The family who hears the “you know how that happens” joke WAY too often.
For six months we have prayed and sought God’s direction for the future of our family. God has confirmed over and over again that his plan for us is to adopt again. And his message has been clear. On Tuesday night, after wrestling through the decision to become “those people” one more time, I (Erin) called God to the carpet. I realize, that is a dangerous thing to do. But we were both needing to hear it one more time. I announced, “If we are going to do this, I need You to say it loud and clear, one more time. And You have till tomorrow night.”
The next morning, this is what I woke up to.
The devotional went on to say, “Adoption is amazing. Someone who wants a child purposely chooses them and takes them as their own to love and care for.” Then later, “A good father is not silent toward his children.” Thank you God for not being silent towards us.
We heard it, loud and clear.
So, we are beginning the journey of our second adoption and our fifth child. Some of you will be excited. Others will think we are crazy and irresponsible. You will call us, “Those People.” Especially once you find out that we will be adopting an older child, 5-9 years old, from Ethiopia.
We will wear the title with honor, knowing that for us, earth is work and heaven is rest. We get the privilege to live and work for a short time, ushering in a new kingdom and seeing his will done on earth as it is in heaven. He adopted us, recklessly loving us to the point of death. This is a small part of the overflow of that love.
There is much work to be done, and we have one more seat left in the minivan.
Together for Adoption
We returned home yesterday from the Together for Adoption conference with a renewed passion and vision for orphan care in Northwest Arkansas. The speakers were inspiring. The music of Aaron Ivey was inspiring. Even the breakout sessions were inspiring. Here are some quick thoughts from the weekend:
Be brave in your prayers and steadfast in your faith. – Dr. Susan Hillis
Dr. Hillis told the story of the miracle taking place in Ukraine. The local church in Ukraine began to understand the theology of adoption and made the orphan crisis in their country their problem. Over the course of 10 years, the total number of orphans has dropped 90%, from 300,000 to 30,000. We need to pray for movements in every country of the world within the local church.
The new metric for the church should be zero. – Dave Gibbons
In an American church that is consumed with numbers, a new and challenging number for the church to strive towards is ZERO. Zero children waiting for adoption in your state. Zero need for more foster parents in your county. A world with zero orphans.
Tell stories that change stories. – Esther Havens
Esther is a humanitarian photographer for several non-profit organizations around the country. That simple quote reignited my passion to tell the stories of those whose voice isn’t heard. And not just to tell their stories, but to change their stories.
The church is the mother to the motherless. – Robert Gelinas
If God is the father to the fatherless, and the church is the bride of christ, then we are the mother to the motherless. Pastor Gelinas went on to say, if you say you can’t afford adoption then you are calling God a dead beat dad who won’t provide for his children. The members of his church only pay $50 to adopt a child within their local foster care system. The church pays for the rest of the fees. That is a church that believes in caring for the orphans in their own backyard.
It is a calling, not a hobby. – J.D. Greear
So, where do we go from here? It starts in our own church and community. We have some big ideas and goals for our Cross Church family that we hope people will rally behind. Not everyone is called to adopt, but every christian is called to care for the orphans. It is a calling, not a hobby. And it is a calling for the entire body of Christ.
Three in School
Exactly one year ago, our family was on an airplane headed to Malawi Africa to live for two months. A lot has changed in the last year, including our kids. They have grown up overnight, it seems. Catherine and Easton started first grade. Sophia is in preschool. Addis turned two. It has been a crazy ride, one that I hope to write more about in the coming days as we reflect back on our time in Africa. For now, here is our first week of school.
School uniforms make everything a little more challenging in the morning. First graders don’t really get the concept of a belt, and it doesn’t seem to be catching on very quickly. With uniforms comes uniformity. However, a loud pair of socks and the universal dress/casual/all-around Chuck Taylor’s kicks that out the window.
By the way, Erin cut all of her hair off. I call it her movie star hair. She calls it her 5-minute-to-get-ready-mommy-hair. Either way, I dig it.
This also happens to be the first year the twins are in separate classrooms. Catherine came home after the first day and said, “I think it was a great idea to put us in different classrooms.” Thanks for approving, Catherine.
Next, it was Sophie’s turn to go to school. She has been majorly excited about school, and she was very disappointed to learn that she would only be going three days a week. I am not sure that her teacher has heard her speak yet, but she sure talks about it when she gets home.
Buy Esther’s House on DVD
If you enjoyed the series and want to get a copy, you can buy them online for $20. Half of the proceeds from your purchase will go to support the orphans at Esther’s House.
